So this is just one of those posts I don’t feel like scheduling because I’m going to post this diary to my personal blog and I want to be as passive aggressive as I possibly fucking can in this entry so that the people who I’m being passive aggressive about read it and know that they should have never went on here.

When you have DID, you go through the messages of what other people have wrote about you and you just get this frustration of never being able to say anything about it because you were snooping. Yeah. That’s okay.

How dare Ciel say that he’s tired of my breakdowns? That he can’t handle them? I’m staring at the text messages right now and I’m just completely fucking baffled. I get it, I can be overbearing, but Jesus Christ? Imagine how I’m fucking feeling, I’m the one having the fucking breakdown.

Saying something like that just worsens my state of mind! I want to fucking die right now because, news flash, guess who just (in her mind) realized that her husband actually fucking hates her! Whoops, you guessed right! It’s me.

I just lost the love of my life and my best friend and my brother so there’s literally no fucking point in living I’m tired I’m done the world just needs to fucking stop! I want to fucking die!

I cannot fucking stand anything!

I’m so tired oh my God, everyone fucking hates me! Everyone hates me and they refuse to fucking admit it! I don’t want to know anything once I’m dead! They better not fucking cry over me once I’m dead! I’m fucking done with this fucking stupid planet! I’m tired! I’m done! I hate being sad and I hate feeling emotions!

I SWEAR TO GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I WILL BLOCK THEM ON EVERYTHING!!!!!!!!!!! They don’t deserve to BREATHE in my direction! I hate everyone and everything I fucking can’t stand this anymore!!!!!!!

I’m so TIRED enjoy fucking having Celeste around because I’m literally so fucking done !!!! i hate myself all i do!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! is make mistakes so IM JUST BETTER OFF FUCKING DEAD!!!!!!!!!!!!


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